How to know you are healthy emotionally

People who are healthy in themselves, ready for love and love-able show some of the following qualities, characteristics and attitudes:

· They don’t expect others to make them feel good. They are not always looking for approval acceptance or appreciation from outside themselves. Their feelings about themselves do not depend on the opinions of others, yet they are comfortable with compliments and acknowledgement given to them.

· They feel loveable regardless of their weaknesses or mistakes. They are not plagued with quilt, shame, fears and inadequacies. They are not too demanding or condemning of themselves, their children or others. Acceptance and forgiveness is not hard for them.

· They do good things for the quality of their own life, not for reward or recognition. They feel that their value comes from who they are more than what they do. They do not have to achieve great things or prove anything to anyone in order to feel good about themselves.

· They don’t live in fear of what others may think. They do not need to spend a lot of time, energy or resources keeping up an image or front. They are not afraid of expressing their own personality, feelings or opinions and do not need to be defensive or protective about themselves.
· They have a sense of empathy, acceptance of and compassion for other people. They understand human dilemmas and don’t feel the need to be controlling or critical as other people work things out for themselves, maybe in their time and in different ways.

· They are willing and able to generate energy, love and care towards others. They give without waiting for others to give back in return. They reach out naturally and warmly, giving of themselves.

· They radiate and unaffected and genuine humanity that makes them appealing and attractive. Even if they have had disappointments and setbacks, they are not afraid of love or life. They radiate energy, enthusiasm, personality, hope and heart and other people respond readily to this warmth and naturalness

· They look after themselves. They do not feel that it is selfish to make sure they feel good and look good. They keep themselves healthy, balanced, motivated and attractive, seeking fulfilment and quality in their life. They manage their time and resources so that their needs are not always last on the list.

· They pursue communication and understanding in their relationships. They are not oversensitive and do not need to resort to denial, blame, defence or attack in their interactions with others. They are not withholding or detached and do not avoid intimacy or being truly known by others.

· They are open and honest in expressing themselves. They are not superficial and they give others the space and freedom to express themselves as well. They listen, contribute and care as they communicate. They are not afraid of admitting their own struggles, confusions, troubles or triumphs in life.

· They are natural and comfortable with themselves. They have their own style and way of being and they enjoy others being themselves too. They don’t feel inadequate or needy and do not need to be smothering, jealous, demanding or guarded in their relationships.

· They can express themselves on all levels, social as well as intimate. They are not afraid of intimacy and have a desire to know themselves and be known in return. They have nothing to hide and are comfortable with themselves, warts and all. They so not have boundaries or mannerisms that keep others out.